Mingle Post! Our First Class Post~ [Action]

[netherworld_lolitics]

[You've all arrived by your own will or have been hustled into a classroom by a flock of stampeding prinnies. You've been in the room for a few minutes before your first teacher shows up, fashionably late~]

[It's some kind of effeminate flower person: Senator Trap!]

... why are you all here? This is class. You don't belong here.

[Sigh] Making my life hard.

Alright, whatever. I'm Senator Trap and this class is "Zen-Not-Giving-A-Care." I'd have prepared a lesson plan, but it turns out I'm already a master at not caring. So I guess that means you're all going to have to learn from my example as I spend the next hour and a half playing Tetris. [pulls out his myPhone.]

Of course, if you actually care about learning, you're already failing this class.

Comments

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

[RECOIL! SHOCK! HORROR!]

To suck the water out of food is to suck the heart out of cooking! Can you not hear the cries of the tormented ingredients, whose harmonious blend of tastes has been so wasted!?

[good_news_everyone]

That's hogwash! Everyone knows the only food that has feelings are the dancing movie concession snacks.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

You are terribly blind to the hearts of ingredients! This is a thing that gives me pain!

[good_news_everyone]

Yes, well, sight is one of those things that leaves as you grow older, along with hearing and common sense.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Hyahya, but you have not named taste! Only through the blend of tastes can you truly know the world.

[good_news_everyone]

[EATING HIS STEAK DAMN IT WITH HIS DEHYDRATED KNIFE AND FORK THAT HE JUST REHYDRATED]

[also with robot dentures that just chewed up his food into a fine paste; they're chattering on the table]

[WELCOME TO THE FUTURE WORLD OF TOMORROW]

[spooning himself paste]

And I suppose you just go around licking everything like some kind of dog.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Hyahya! True taste comes from the heart, not the tongue!

[good_news_everyone]

Yes, well, I suppose I could use a new one of those.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Hyahya, ahyahyahya! Age is no object! No heart is incapable of the passion true cooking needs!

[good_news_everyone]

Oh I don't know about that.

[Clearly you've never seen a heart that was in the stomach of a space wasp, Champloo]

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

[Details, details. He's twenty times the Professor's age!]

Doubt leads to fallen souffles! Only belief and conviction can properly top a casserole!

[good_news_everyone]

Ooh, soft foods.

[eating his steak paste]

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

[Without anyone noticing, Champloo quickly whips up a bowl of magnificent beef-broth soup, mild but exquisitely flavorful, and sets it down for the Professor.]

May I suggest you try this?

[good_news_everyone]

Well I don't see the harm...

[good_news_everyone]

!!!

[adsfja;lskdfj]

Sweet zombie Jesus, this is actually pretty good!

[pulls out a can of ... Torgo's Executive Powder? And seasons lightly with pink powder] Mmmm~

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Understand the difference between a dehydrated steak and food prepared with the heart!

[good_news_everyone]

Would it be possible to de and rehydrate this?

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Is it possible to dehydrate the human soul, then rehydrate it again? It would be tough and hard as fruit leather!

[good_news_everyone]

There's no proof the soul even exists. All we've been able to measure is "life energy."

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Here in the Netherworld, souls are a fact of life.

[good_news_everyone]

Come back when you have some proof.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

You shall find out in time, boom!