Mingle Post! Our First Class Post~ [Action]

[netherworld_lolitics]

[You've all arrived by your own will or have been hustled into a classroom by a flock of stampeding prinnies. You've been in the room for a few minutes before your first teacher shows up, fashionably late~]

[It's some kind of effeminate flower person: Senator Trap!]

... why are you all here? This is class. You don't belong here.

[Sigh] Making my life hard.

Alright, whatever. I'm Senator Trap and this class is "Zen-Not-Giving-A-Care." I'd have prepared a lesson plan, but it turns out I'm already a master at not caring. So I guess that means you're all going to have to learn from my example as I spend the next hour and a half playing Tetris. [pulls out his myPhone.]

Of course, if you actually care about learning, you're already failing this class.

Comments

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Name one dish that is one thing only, and I shall accept that.

[cutestsuperweapon]

Plain rice?

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

The thought that you would consider that a dish hurts me! But rice must be cooked in water.

[cutestsuperweapon]

Uhm...how about a sliced apple?

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Again with the terrible dishes! But a sliced apple has had its core removed!

[cutestsuperweapon]

Really? Oh!

That explains a lot...

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

An apple is a tasty fruit, but the core cannot be eaten and the seeds are poisonous. To prepare the apple, you must take away these parts!

[cutestsuperweapon]

Nobody told me! So that's why people were mad at me then!

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

"Then"? You offered an apple without preparation?

[cutestsuperweapon]

Yes... Looks like I messed up! Oopsy.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

As a snack -- not a dish -- an apple may be prepared simply by the way it is bitten into.

[cutestsuperweapon]

Where is the difference between a snack and a dish?

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

A snack is merely food to sustain! A meal satisfies body and soul!

[cutestsuperweapon]

Oh, I wouldn't know, I don't actually need food.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

You still can eat, do you not?

[cutestsuperweapon]

...That's true! I just don't really know what's good and what's not cause I don't remember and the bugs mostly had fruit, see?

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Then perhaps a quick lesson is in order!

[With a melodramatic gesture, he turns and produces out of seemingly nowhere a bowl of soup.]

This is conventional canned chicken noodle soup. Try it if you dare, but do so swiftly! Touching this brings my heart to tears!

[cutestsuperweapon]

Yummy! Thank you!

[She ate it, rather quickly (even if it was really hot...which it might have been]

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

Yummy?! Aigh! Those words are sharp and spicy like jalepeno nachos! Will you still say that after you have tried THIS?

[Without anyone noticing, he's prepared his own soup, only from the freshest ingredients and most savory spice, simmered to perfection. The rich, heady scent of chicken and broth wafts up as he unveils the bowl, offering it.]

[cutestsuperweapon]

More yummy soup? You're such a kind grampa!

[She dug in cheerfully, happy that the nice man was being so nice to her, after explaining so much she didn't understand!]

Yummy!

...[She paused, considering it. She was also wondering where the food came from. Maybe he was a kind of demon god, just not of destruction, like her, but of food?]

Yummier than the last one, too! There was more in it and it was more different.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

[If he is a god of food, it is merely metaphorical -- much like everything about him.]

The first was crafted by a machine! The second was crafted from the heart. This is the difference of cooking!

[cutestsuperweapon]

Ooh, I see. So I couldn't really cook well, but you can! That makes sense.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

If you cannot eat, it is only because a dish has not been placed before you.

[cutestsuperweapon]

But I meant cook, not eat. I could eat? I just did.

[kitchenfistfirechaosstyle]

It is a metaphor! If you can live, you can cook!