A little Bird sings her Feelings to the world...

[former_endboss]

1)ACTION
[A girl with a long skirt and a bokken is threatening students and taking their lunch money. Bother her?]

2) Video:

So. What's a girl got to do for fun around here?

Comments

[former_endboss]

Ahh. Well, that type is usually canon fodder or heroes-it all depends on skill and how the enemy reacts to the crazy running at them screaming. Sounds like you have the later.

I'm a Reyvateil Beta. On the upside, I've got a hundred and twenty years of my life left, and I'll always look this good. On the downside, if I'm cut off from my server for more than about an hour, I die instantly. I've got a built-in kill switch.

[hit_girl_mindy]

She can seem like that, but she's actually pretty damn versatile. I'm the planner usually though.

What do you mean server? When I hear that, I just think of a computer or something.

[former_endboss]

Ahh, this is where my story gets complex. I am a computer program, for certain values of programs and computers. Magic in my world requires a certain amount of high-technology to work, and I am made of magic. In fact, my body was made by casting the right spells on a tank of special salt water and creating a five-year old me. And when my body was destroyed, I was able to survive for a time inside the equipment that creates my power. A significant portion of my soul is stored on a computer, and if I can't 'dial home' regularly, my body will shut down and dissolve.

The really crazy thing is that this body is realistic enough despite all that to be able to carry a child to term. I'm not sure if the scientists who designed that feature were total creeps or geniuses.

[hit_girl_mindy]

...Dude, that is one of the craziest stories I have ever heard. Not that I don't believe it of course, anything can happen in this place. It's just wild to know that I'm talking with a living, breathing computer program.

Would you want to, though? I'm not even sure if I would.

[former_endboss]

The breathing should be stranger than the living-I know quite a few AIs and androids left over from that period, and they're a lot simpler in some ways than I am.

Hey, having kids is an option, not a requirement. And the alternative would be the 'anatomically correct' model they used on the first Alphas, they look like dolls. No thanks, I think that I prefer being able to have sex.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Hmm. I'll keep that in mind.

Wouldn't the alternative be a NOT anatomically correct model?

Whoa, whoa. No one was ruling sex out, that's definitely not an option for me either. It's the kid thing I'm hesitant about!

[former_endboss]

I had airquotes around that phrase, don't ignore them. It was mocking, not factual.

Well they kinda go hand in hand. No reason to give a girl a set of urges and equipment if they're useless.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Right.

I guess, though there are always precautions you take in case you don't want one.

[former_endboss]

Precautions that are only necessary if you have a reproductive system. If you don't have one, from the point of view of the scientists, why would you need the external components? I mean you have to keep in mind, my personal pleasure was never on those bastards minds, every aspect of this body was made to serve them. My face is based on classical dimensions of beauty, my height set low to make me easily man-handled, and my emotional state deliberately restricted so I wouldn't object to being mistreated.

They botched a few details of that last one by the way.

[hit_girl_mindy]

[Here, Mindy was going to make a face. If there was one thing she really hated, it was the idea of using someone to fulfill ones own sexual/twisted whims. it smacked of the most repulsive, disgusting fanboy wet dreams, and had she ever met anyone like that she would have gutted them like a fish and sleep soundly afterward].

I'm glad they did. Words can't describe what I feel about hearing that. How did you manage to, I dunno, defy their programming?

[former_endboss]

Oh, they suffered greatly for their crimes, when I finally broke down the barriers. But it broke down over time, when I was a little girl, a teenager, and a grown woman, significant events that marked shifts in my mindset from adoring to genocidal. At which point...well it was a lot of dead people.

[hit_girl_mindy]

I can see that. I mean, if you get pent up for that long, you have all these feelings that build up, right? I can understand how a bunch of people would wind up dead.

[former_endboss]

And when your only friend slash mentor slash mother figure is being attacked with the intent of torturing her? Yeah, that'll push you over the edge.

Don't do what I did and destroy cities though, that's just overreacting.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Can't relate there. Never knew my mom.

Nah, I'm nowhere near that powerful yet, and even if it was, you never do something like that without thinking.

[former_endboss]

It is actually shockingly easy to do something like that when you are a living strategic weapon.

[Mir indicates the melted hole where the rock pile used to be]

That was the tactical weapons system. The big guns rip the planet open like an orange for over 500 kilometers.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Shit. And here I thought I was one, you're one literally.

And you're not even thinking of that as an option, of course.

[former_endboss]

Well, no. It's not really an option because I don't have the targeting equipment and they've been offline for 700 years. That's what they call in strategy games, an 'off map' power.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Probably better off. No one wants to think of the world exploding anyway.

"Off map?"

[former_endboss]

Yeah. The spell is called Ar Tonelico, my last name is Ar Tonelico, and my home is the Tower of Ar Tonelico, a megastructure that reaches up from the planet into space. That's where the guns for the display you just watched are-I just target them and open the portals to let the fire through.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Huh. I still am gonna have to get used to all the things you guys can do...and while I'm at it, defining who "you guys" are.

You can get portals here too?

[former_endboss]

Well, my roommate is a dragon, if that helps any.

I've got to-but they aren't exactly multipurpose if you get my drift. The union made me promise not to cut in on their turf.

[hit_girl_mindy]

A dragon? You mean besides the one my girlfriend has? Does he, or she I guess, talk?

Yeah, I'll bet they wouldn't want any of that. Killjoys.

[former_endboss]

She does talk-and she won't appreciate having another dragon as someone's pet, even if they are the non-talking variety. She's a big talker, but she's just left her mother's lair, she's about the equivalent of 16 or so. Black scales, acid that will eat through almost anything, and a real magical prodigy.

They were very clear that they would break my knees if I send anyone home, so I can't do anything on that front.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Huh. I'll have to tell Ruff to steer clear then. She just got her dragon from her world.

Uh. Damn. Demon mafia man.

[former_endboss]

Ixie is a bit prejudiced against people who do that sort of thing-on her world, the Dragons are in charge. And pretty keen to keep it that way. So yes, I would appreciate that.

The demon mafia indeed.