It's 8 o'clock, and time for the debate! We're coming to you live tonight from our studios here in the visual arts department of the Academy, and let me tell you, it's been a long time since anyone dusted in here. I've got to say though, Plenair and the set are looking sharp tonight. The prinnies in makeup and our construction departments must have gone above and beyond the call of duty. Free fish for all of them, one anchovy each. They've earned it, and now it's our turn. For more information on the format of the debate, we go to my identical twin on camera two!

The rules of the debate are simple. As Moderator, Plenair has exclusive rights to use deadly force to control the pace of the debate and may shoot anyone at any time. Plenair asks questions and each person the question is directed to may use up to two minutes to respond. After their response, ninety seconds for a rebuttal from any other candidate is allowed. At any time, Plenair may shut off any microphone or shoot anyone who she feels is over their time limit or off track. Since there are no clocks in the studio, Plenair's finely honed internal clock is the sole judge, jury and executioner here tonight. To facilitate rapid revival in the case of death, the entire floor has been wired for electricity, and we have Hello Nurse standing by to provide medical assistance.

Well said, my identical looking brother, well said. A reminder to our audience at home, this is the only debate, so we'll be covering very few of the topics you actually care about. Tonight’s debate will instead be dedicated primarily to 'Where's the Pork?' a special question section about who will bring home the most bacon to the student body, 'You have no canon', our 37th part in the debate about Original characters who we are not allowed to steal and whether or not they should be allowed into our community, and 'Are you crazy enough to be here' where we as the hard hitting questions about whether our candidates are mad enough to roll with the Senate and we attempt to ferret out their one-sentence description. We go now to Plenair for our introduction to the candidates.

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